Wall painter on the dole

Hello, I am an American designer working in paris. You know how french people can be, and what they think of us, so I don´t have many friends.
I am trying to get some freelance works in “luxury” design, but as I can´t seem to, I do also paint murals from time to time.
I don´t know how much to charge, so I would much appreciate your help.
I like to write in this forum because itakes my head off not having anything to eat.

Once upon a time (allegedly) in a forest, there lived an orphaned bunny rabbit and an orphaned snake. by surprising coincidence, both were blind from birth.

One day the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was
slithering through the Forrest also, when the bunny tripped over the
snake and fell down. This of course knocked the snake about quite a bit.

“Oh my” said the bunny, “I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t see you and sorry
if I hurt you. But I’ve been blind since birth, so you see, I can’t see
where I’m going. In fact, since I’m also an orphan, I don’t know what I am.”

“It’s quite all right” replied the snake. “Actually, my story is much the same as yours. I to have been blind since birth, and also never knew my mother. I tell you what, maybe I can tell you what you are I could just slither all over you and work out what you are? And at least you’ll have that going for you.”

“Oh that would be wonderful!” replied the bunny. So the snake slithered
all over the bunny, and said, “Well, your covered with soft fur; you
have really long ears; your nose twitches; and you have a cottony tail.
so I’d say that you must be a bunny rabbit.”

“Oh thank you! Thank you!” cried the bunny, in obvious excitement.
The bunny suggested to the snake, “Maybe I could feel you all over with my paw, and help you the same way you helped me.”

So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked, “Well, you’re smooth
and slippery, and you have a forked tongue, and no backbone, and no balls … I’d say you must be french.”

Lol! that´s the funniest joke i´ve heard in ages!!! cheers

Yeah did you hear of the new French tank under development - very high tech - 5 gears to go in reverse and 1 gear to go forward - in case you get attacked from behind! Zing!!!

I always find they love it when you say “I’m an American, you would be speaking German or Russian if it weren’t for us!”.

while I’ve never had any problems with any French people, and I love Paris, I do have to ask:

How many Frenchmen does it take to defend France from invasion?

No one knows, they’ve never tried it… badum bum, thanks I’ll be here all week, try the steak.

Actually just this weekend they were selling some nice french rifles down the street - they were in great shape, only been dropped twice! Yowza!