I had the same problem. My solution was to disable icloud back-up for contacts and just backed the phones up in itunes with the cord. As far as apps and such, we just delete the ones that aren’t wanted on that particular device. Not really that much of a hassle and it saves cash in the itunes store. Don’t know what’s going on with your texts though. Sounds like your messaging is not set up correctly. Hope this helps a bit. Cheers