Jonathan Ive Myths thread

Ive’s dad is the dos equis’s most interesting man in the world.

I hear he can fly. He’d do it more, but teleporting is waaaaayyy cooler.

Jonathan Ive killed 12 men when he found out that auto-correction on the iPhone changes Ive to I’ve

Ha! Nice one rukka.

Ives believes in eating one freshly CNC milled aluminum apple each day.

Ive had enough… . I can 't read these anymore. … .

Jonny Ive’s home computer runs Ubuntu.

Jonny Ive is the only person in the 'Verse to own both seasons of Firefly.

Jonny Ive transferred Steve’s mind and soul into a repurposed Macintosh Classic and will reboot him when Android, Windows, BlackBerry, Asus, and Dell start threatening Apple again.

RIP Steve. :frowning:

Every cell in Jonny Ive’s body can draw G3 curves freehand

a photo of Jonny Ive, applied directly to a wound, dramatically improves healing

Jonathan Ive is so good he can make a Philippe Starck design practical

Bring back!

When playing hide and seek, Jonathan Ive always counts down from infinity.

The iPad mini was a result of Johnny Ives squeezing his iPad too hard .

:wink:

Bump!

After a long Apple keynote, Jony finds it hard to stretch and reawaken himself without looking like he is having a heart attack.

I have just finished reading the recently released bio about him : http://www.amazon.co.uk/Jony-Ive-Genius-Greatest-Products/dp/159184617X hence the bump. I highly recommend it. its a great insight into not only his education days but also into how his early years at apple developed.

Lol let’s see.

Every straight street corner automatically rounds itself when Jony Ives arrives.

With every step Jony Ives takes, the world becomes a little flatter.

Jony Ives removed his own skeleton for an ultra lightweight exo-skeleton right under his skin.

When Jony Ives goes to sleep, his consciousness travels to all Apple devices simultaneously so he can make the necessary improvements.

Jony has never apologized. He is unapologetically unapologetic.

Jony’s head was the prototype impact extrusion tool for the Mac Pro.

Theres a lot of gold here.

https://twitter.com/JonyIveParody